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SantaBanta SMS

Santa Banta SMS

Dress code 4 a party - BLACK TIES ONLY.

Dress code 4 a party - BLACK TIES ONLY.
Banta goes for the party & is surprised to see that the other guests are wearing SUITS also!
 

Don?t rush in love for it never runs out. Let

Don?t rush in love for it never runs out. Let love be the one to knock at your door, so by the time you start to fall, you know that your feeling is for sure.
 

Beggar: Oh sundari, andha hoon, paanch rupya de

Beggar: Oh sundari, andha hoon, paanch rupya de de.
Santa to his wife: De de, De de, tujhe sundari bola hai to har haal main ye andha hai.
 

Banta: Yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho?

Banta: Yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho?
Santa: Suicide karne ke liye
Banta: To phir ubalne ki kya zaroorat hai?
Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye
 

Banta: Yaar teri wife di maut da bara afsos

Banta: Yaar teri wife di maut da bara afsos hoya, vaise hoya ki si?
Sant: Goli lagi si mathe vich.
Banta: Waheguru ji da shukar kar ke akh bach gayi.
 

Banta: Y do u take ur wife only to night

Banta: Y do u take ur wife only to night clubs?
Santa: By the time she gets ready no other place is open
 

Banta: U looked troubled, what?s ur prob?

Banta: U looked troubled, what?s ur prob?
Santa: I?m going to b a father
Banta: But, that's wonderful
Santa: What's wonderful! My wife doesn't know about it yet
 

Banta: Some people can tell time by looking at

Banta: Some people can tell time by looking at the sun.
Santa: But I've never been able to see the numbers
 

Banta: Meri biwi mujhe chod ke chali gayi.

Banta: Meri biwi mujhe chod ke chali gayi.
Santa: Tu uska khyal nahi rakhta hoga.
Banta: Arre yaar, Sagi behan ki tarah rakhta tha.
 

Banta: I've discovered the origin of the

Banta: I've discovered the origin of the word Good-Bye
Santa: Oh, yeah? What's it? Banta: Many years ago, some husband said to his wife, 'I'm leaving u!' & the wife said: Good! Bye!
 

At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O

At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I hv lst my hand, oh!
Santa: Control urself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?
 

An Englishman and Santa inside the toilet.

An Englishman and Santa inside the toilet.
Englishman: Good evening, how do u do?
Santa: Gud evening, we open the zip and do.
 

American: In our country , marriage even

American: In our country ,
marriage even takes place with email.
Santa: In India, it is only with a female
 

A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khediye.

A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khediye.
Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoe paa ke hune aaya.
 

A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.

A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa doesn?t turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out.
 

A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell,Santa

A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell,Santa doesn't turns up for 4 days. Lady calls again, Santa replies,I'm coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out.
 

A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell,

A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell,
Santa doesn’t turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies,
I’m coming daily since 4 days,
I press the bell but no one comes out.
 

A lady asked Santa: LIPTON di chah hai?

A lady asked Santa: LIPTON di chah hai?
Santa replied: Mainu ta nahi hai ji, tainu hai ta lipat ja...
 

A crow shits on a Banta. Preeto gives tissue

A crow shits on a Banta. Preeto gives tissue paper to him.
Banta: Koi phayda nahin, kauwa toh ud gaya!
 

A Chini was in hospital. SANTA went to

A Chini was in hospital.
SANTA went to meet him.
Chini said "CHING CHONG, MOU.CHU CHA" & died.
SANTA went china 2 know the meaning,
that was:-
KUTTE OXYGN K PIPE SE PAIR Utha.
 

While walking in the highlands Santa fell down a

While walking in the highlands Santa fell down a deep hole.Banta: R u ok?Santa: Yeah!Banta: Did u break anything?Santa: No, there's nothing down here.
 

What's Ford?Santa: Gaari.What's

What's Ford?Santa: Gaari.What's Oxford?Santa: So simple, Bail Gaari.
 
 
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