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Dirty SMS Jokes

A young man asks a kind priest: Father is it a sin 2 sleep

A young man asks a kind priest: Father is it a sin 2 sleep wid a gal? Father: No my child but d problem is tat u guys never sleep.
 

An old man stared @ a guy wid red,green n blue hair. Guy

An old man stared @ a guy wid red,green n blue hair. Guy asked:Wat oldie,nevr done nythng wild? Oldie: F*cked a peacock once.. Wonderin if ur my son!!
 

Luv ur luv in such a way tht she finds no bettr place than

Luv ur luv in such a way tht she finds no bettr place than ur heart 2 stay But if she stil manages 2 get away Srry Dude, its time 2 turn G*Y!!
 

On a wedding nght a nervous Husband tells his Wife Im

On a wedding nght a nervous Husband tells his Wife 'Im just 5 Ft 6 inches! & ur..?' Wife: 'Forget the 5ft.Lets Concentrate on d 6 inches!'
 

What indicates the color of panty? Black: Sexy Blue:

What indicates the color of panty? Black: Sexy Blue: Charming Red: Danger White: Not tonight Brown: Never Washed
 

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss But I only slept

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss But I only slept with you, because I was pissed!
 

If a married women is called Polo.. The mint with a

If a married women is called "Polo.. The mint with a Hole" Whats an un-married women called? "Center Fresh"
 

Judge: Y do u want divorce?

Judge: Y do u want divorce? He: She doesn't satisfy me in bed She: The whole colony is happy, only this idiot has a problem!
 

A woman gave birth 2 6 babies n on seeing dis she got off

A woman gave birth 2 6 babies n on seeing dis she got off d bed n slapped her husband n shouted, I told u not 2 go Doggy Style..!
 

Why is a cucumber and a beer better than men? Coz beer

Why is a cucumber and a beer better than men? Coz beer comes in a can not in ur mouth, and a cucmber stays hard for weeks.
 

Q: Who is senior, PENIS or VAGINA. A: VAGINA cos PENIS

Q: Who is senior, PENIS or VAGINA. A: VAGINA cos PENIS always stands up when he sees a VAGINA... So respect the seniors!
 

Whats the difference between men and women? Women must

What's the difference between men and women? Women must play hard to get, men must get hard to play!
 

Doing business wid u is like wearing a condom, it gives 1

Doing business wid u is like wearing a condom, it gives 1 a feeling of faith n security while getting screwed...
 

In a hospital 2 nurses were discussing about the new

In a hospital 2 nurses were discussing about the new doctor. 1st say he dresses so well, 2nd says yes, and so quickly too!!
 

Ppl wasted a lot of time talking abt who came 1st, the

ppl wasted a lot of time talking abt who came 1st, the chicken or the egg. But it was surely the cock!
 

8 qualities of a Perfect Husband Brave, Intelligent,

8 qualities of a Perfect Husband Brave, Intelligent, Gentle Polite, Energetic, Nutty, Industrious, Sensitive And if all else fails, read the CAPITAL LETTERS only!
 

To make it straight, she pulls it. 2 make it stand, she

To make it straight, she pulls it. 2 make it stand, she rubs it. 2 make it stiff, she licks it. 2 let it "IN" she pushes it. True! Threading a needle is not easy!
 

Beauty is 2 c & 2 touch, Flowers r 2 smell & 2 pluck,

Beauty is 2 c & 2 touch, Flowers r 2 smell & 2 pluck, Nipples r 2 play & 2 suck, Women r 2 luv & 2 *uck, All these r free but all depends on LUCK!
 

Q: What is the definition of Mistress? A: Someone

Q: What is the definition of Mistress? A: Someone between the Mister and the Mattress.
 

Hickery Dickery Dock this bitch was sucking my cock the

Hickery Dickery Dock this bitch was sucking my cock the clock struck 2 I dropped my glue and left her at the end of the block.
 

Sex - Symbol of Love PENIS - Length of Love PUSSY -

Sex - Symbol of Love PENIS - Length of Love PUSSY - Depth of Love.. BOOBS - Shape of Love... BUTTS - Base of Love...
 

Latest rhymes in SCHOOL... Twinkle, twinkle little

Latest rhymes in SCHOOL... Twinkle, twinkle little STAR, I just went to ROYAL BAR. Quater rates r up so HIGH, So drink a beer with Chicken FRY !!!
 
 
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