Funny SMS


 
 
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Dirty SMS Jokes

OUCH! Its 2 tight Don;t worry luv well try 2 do

OUCH! Its 2 tight Don;t worry luv we'll try 2 do it slowly. Push it in.... ah...! It's painful... Ok! Lets get another wedding ring!
 

A Man pays 1000 2 a Pros

A Man pays 1000 2 a Pros, she ranway, he chases but she slips away. He puts notice, Any1 finds gal in white top & red skirt, FUCK HER, ITS PRE-PAID.
 

Whts common btn the SUN & WOMENS UNDERWEAR? * both are

whts common btn the SUN & WOMEN'S UNDERWEAR? * both are hot. * both look better while going down * both disappear by night.
 

During Sex the sardarni asks repeatedlly do u luv me,

During Sex the sardarni asks repeatedlly "do u luv me, do u really love me"? Sardar (irritated)- What the hell do u think I am doing pushups
 

Taking a clue from recent budget, a call girl now charges

Taking a clue from recent budget, a call girl now charges extra for anal entry. She calls it "Turn over" tax.
 

Doctor: Ur knees all blistered? Lady: Coz of doggy

Doctor: Ur knees all blistered? Lady: Coz of doggy style!! Doctor: Cant u do it any other style? Lady: Oh, I can, but the dog can't!!!
 

A peach is a peach A plum is a plum, A kiss isnt a

A peach is a peach A plum is a plum, A kiss isn't a kiss Without some tongue. So open up your mouth close your eyes, and give your tongue some exercise!!
 

IF THE PENIS IS HARD

IF THE PENIS IS HARD & ERECT IT NEEDS GOOD FUCK, IF ITS ERECT BUT SOFT IT NEEDS GOOD SUCK, IF ITS NITHER HARD NOR ERECT, IT NEEDS GOOD LUCK!
 

A thirsty paitent asks a nurse for milk, she opened her

A thirsty paitent asks a nurse for milk, she opened her top & put her nipples in his mouth, he said THANK GOD I DIDN'T ask for water.
 

Santa: I m organising group sex at my home, will u

Santa: I m organising group sex at my home, will u join? Banta: Yes, yes how many people r there? Santa: Just three, Me, U and....ur wife.
 

The Bible teaches to love your neighbour, and Kama-Sutra

The Bible teaches to love your neighbour, and Kama-Sutra explains how!
 

What is a similarity between sex and shopping? Men cant

What is a similarity between sex and shopping? Men can't hold either for more than 5 min
 

Son 2 dad does a heart have legs? dad NO, son dont

son 2 dad does a heart have legs? dad NO, son don't lie I heard u say, sweet heart spread ur legs.
 

What is the similarity between TEA & WOMEN? both give

what is the similarity between TEA & WOMEN? both give pleasure when HOT, both are tasteless without MILK. both are enjoyed mostly in BED...
 

At a funeral, a heart shaped coffin was made 4 a

At a funeral, a heart shaped coffin was made 4 a Cardiologist. A Doctor started laughing, When asked y, he said Im thinking of my funeral, im a Gynaecologist..!
 

Newtons 4th law: Every soul in this world has a pole or

Newton's 4th law: Every soul in this world has a pole or hole. When pole goes inside the hole a new sole comes out either with a pole or hole.
 

Q:) Whats the difference between ur job & ur

Q:) Whats the difference between ur job & ur girlfriend? A:) ur job always sucks!!
 

Beat me eat me bite my bum

Beat me eat me bite my bum, whip me strip me make mecum, suck me fuck me andlick me out, then tickle my nipples until I shout!
 

Sex Guide Bak 2 bak, front 2 front, on d table,lick

Sex Guide Bak 2 bak, front 2 front, on d table,lick dcunt, stick it in, do ur ting, do it hard & make her sing, tense ur body feel dcum, den let it rip into her bum!
 

HOT SEX There is Hot-sex, Fast-sex, Group-sex, Safe-sex,

HOT SEX There is Hot-sex, Fast-sex, Group-sex, Safe-sex, Leather-sex, Telephone-sex, and for people with your face ... NO SEX !
 

Lady: Doc i have an infection down there. Doc: how often

Lady: Doc i have an infection down there. Doc: how often do u hav sex. Lady: once in six months. Doc: God thats not infection, thats RUST.
 

Boy Pulls His Nicker & Asks girl Do u Have this? Girl

Boy Pulls His Nicker & Asks girl "Do u Have this? "Girl Lifts her Skirt & Says" My Mom Says If u Have This u Can Get Plenty Of those!
 
 
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